Are you Busy? Feeling like you don’t have control of ANYTHING? So many tasks… So many expectations? Expectations, that others have of us and that we have of ourselves. During this unprecedented time of change, uncertainty, and even anxiety.. we have a need to be “in control of something… anything….” It could be as small as a 15 minute nap as the baby sleeps, or the completion of a STEM work task (large or small). For you it may be setting up a cable/internet account for your senior dad living 5 states away from you. For someone else, it could be managing the care of an elder who you can not go to visit… As our lists of “things to do” change and shift… the trees of our life and what is important are also shifting.
..And then there are times when I am busily doing tasks. It feels like I am tying the task ribbons into bows on my life tree. There are bows that are being crafted by my hands (they represent completed tasks) and I am proud of them. I feel a sense of accomplishment. I am preparing to step back and take a picture of the bows, reflecting on my accomplishments and then someone or something puts a bunch of random ribbons (i.e., tasks) on my tree. This causes me to get upset and to fret about how they distract me and don’t let me finish what I am doing. I did, after all, have a plan. I get anxious because I cannot keep up with the tying of the bows. I may even get upset with the ribbons that others are putting on the tree.
Here is a different way to think about this… I am tying the bows that I WANT to tie and those that are a priority in one section of the tree. When I am done with that – I can take a picture of the section I have completed. Rest, reflect, and then resume… I can then select the other ribbons and put them on the sections of the tree that I want to work on next. I should acknowledge that the other ribbons are there (you know the tasks that others are putting on my life tree) – and finish what I am doing. Then I can strategically, methodically and intentionally get back to the ribbons that have priority.
In some instances – I may need to pull the ribbons off the tree and put them on the ground. Or even give them to another tree belonging to another person. Ahh – now I am getting somewhere…
Be encouraged, stay resilient and celebrate the seemingly small things that are checked off your list (if you are a list-keeping person). Maybe instead of rushing to send off a bunch of emails in between family related tasks… you just…well.. you have a cup of tea. After all there will be another 15 minute interval coming up – you can send that email then…
That is the wisdom of Resilience Ribbons…..
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